Blah! We all have moments in our lives where we get down and blue. I try not to vent on my blog, but at the same time it's MY BLOG. In the words of Eric Cartman from South Park, "Whatever! I'll do what I want!" (Sorry to those who don't get the joke!) Also, I know I am not the only one who likes advise or appreciates honesty. I read on a blog a few months back that you shouldn't use your blog "to air your dirty laundry". Well I agree that there are many things that you shouldn't do as a blogger. Like, bad mouth people or other bloggers. How sad is that? Recently I have read mean comments left on some blogs and I have also read hateful posts about people. Wow, that's bad Karma and lame!!!!!
Anyways, the point of this post is maybe to get some advise. I have been struggling with some things for the past 6 months, maybe even longer. I just don't know what to do or how to shake it off. I am basically a happy person. I love my life and I have a great husband. My problem is how much I have changed as a person.
Love this song! Fits my mood! Florence & The Machine \\ Shake it Out
I care about different things, my views on issues have changed and I feel lost and frustrated because of it. All I want is for people to believe in the things I believe in and care the way I do. How do you do this though? This is all new to me. I used to not care about anything, now I feel I care too much. I feel it draining the life out of me. I don't know how to bring it up to people. Where do you start?
Mostly it's environmental issues. I love the quote, "Be the Change You Wish to See In The World!" Oh, it's so perfect! It sums up how I feel. Yet, how do I influence others to follow me on this awesome journey called life? I try to lead by example, but it doesn't seem to be helping. One of my good friends does see eye to eye with me on every level. She said to me the other day....
I think she hit the nail on the head. The world has left me heartbroken.
Maybe I should stop educating myself on issues? It's overwhelming the way I feel.
I don't understand why people don't recycle. I don't understand why dolphins and whales are being killed everyday. I don't understand why people don't care. Every other issue in the entire world doesn't matter without a healthy planet.
I feel this post is kinda heavy, but I believe honesty is the best policy.
If I wasn't being honest, I wouldn't be being me. :)
So how do you talk to family and friends about issues?
I feel like I need to be open about my feelings and see where that gets me.
How do you cope with issues that are important to you, but don't seem to matter enough to others?
Soon I plan to share with you my favorite documentaries from Netflix. All the things that have changed me.
I have been plotting up for months ideas for my first tattoo! Yes, first. As long as I can get through the pain of "my first", I have a sneaking suspicion there will be many more to come after that! I have waited years to get one. I have debated and debated on whether or not I wanted to get it done. What started out as maybe wanting a Green Day Kerplunk Flower tattoo over 10 years ago, then just a Hello Kitty about 5 years ago and now has become a want for a whale tattoo! Why did I never get one of those other tattoos? They didn't MEAN anything to me. I didn't just want to get one. Even though, I would probably still enjoy looking at those other tattoos if I had them on my body. Oh look, another girl with a hello kitty tattoo. Whoopie Doo! (Please sense my sarcasm!) As my love for whales and saving the planet in general has grown, the lightbulb over my head grew bright! I knew that a whale was what I wanted.
I have been searching the web for inspiration and ideas for what I want my tattoo to look like. I want people to see it and ask me why I have a whale tattooed on my body. It gives me the chance to spark up a conversation about why I think saving whales is so important. Plus I think they are beautiful and fascinating creatures. After learning so much about them, they have earned a special place in my heart.
Where will my tattoo go? Well since my body is a tiny canvas compared to most and go figure I want a tattoo of the biggest mammal on the planet.....I would love it on my right arm. I just think my arm is a bit small to fit it on properly. I guess this is something a tattoo artist will have to help me decide. I am thinking also about starting it on my back and curving it down onto my arm, that way there is more canvas for the artist to work with.
I do want my tattoo to have color. I don't want the whale to only be black. I also want to get the saying, "We live because the sea lives", wrapped around it somehow. Paul Watson uses that quote a lot and I believe it's so true. It really pulls at my heart strings. Here are a few drawings and illustrations that I love...
Decisions & more decisions! I should attempt to draw something myself, but fear I am not talented enough. Also I am so scared that I won't be able to find a good tattoo artist. I am going to very picky about who I let tattoo me. Doing all this is so new to me. Any advise or suggestions?
Read my last post about getting a Whale Tattoo {HERE}
Over the weekend Cody and I headed down to Golden Colorado where the Vegetarian Society of Colorado was holding their annual VegFest Health & Environmental Fair. It was a rainy day, yet somehow the sky in Colorado was still beautiful...
Wow, am I glad I went. I think it will go down as one of those days in my life I will NEVER forget. I enjoyed seeing all the booths setup that were vegan related. There were many animal rescue and sanctuary's there also. The main reason I went though, is because the Sea Shepherd's had a booth there. If you follow my blog maybe you already know that I am a big Sea Shepherd supporter. Maybe you don't even know who the Sea Shepherd's are.
Quickly I will explain a little bit about them and who they are: Sea Shepherd Conservation Society is an international non-profit, marine wildlife conservation organization. Their mission is to end the destruction of habitat and slaughter of wildlife in the world's oceans in order to conserve and protect ecosystems and species. They are loved and they are hated. They are also known for their show on Animal Planet, Whale Wars.
I went to the fair hoping to buy a t-shirt and listen to Peter Hammarstedt's speech he was giving. (Peter is one of my favorite Sea Shepherds and inspires me to make a difference in the world.) As soon as we entered the building, my eyes wandered looking for the black and white Sea Shepherd booth. It was tucked away in the back, yet I spotted it right away. I was so excited and nervous at the same time. I could feel emotion building up inside of me and I was beginning to get teary eyed. The joke between Cody and I all day was that Peter is like my "Justin Bieber". LOL
I don't really get excited about celebrities. I do however get excited about meeting these people who are putting their lives on the line to save whales and other ocean creatures. I was way too nervous to go straight back to the Sea Shepherd booth, so we started on the opposite end and saved it for last. As we walked through the aisles here are some of the things we saw...
I grabbed tons of brochures to read! I haven't had time to look through them yet. I am very interested in educating myself more on how animals are treated in lab tests and on farms, etc. One of my favorite things I picked up had a picture of a puppy and a baby pig on it and it said, "What makes us different?". My answer to this is, NOTHING. That's how I feel about animals. I know not everyone has the same views as I do and they NEVER will, but it's nice to learn about these issues so that you can make an informed decision yourself. That's what I did.
Me posing with my new bumper stickers!
There was a guest speaker at the show talking about being vegan. How people judge you and your diet choices. The most common thing I hear from people when they are "somewhat" interested in my plant based diet is, "I could never do it!" or "I just couldn't give up my favorite foods!". The speaker had a great point: When you say things like that you are setting yourself up for failure. The best thing I can say to you as a vegan is, "Have you tried?" I did it.
I am leading by example and just hope I can inspire someone to switch to this wonderful lifestyle.
Okay I will even admit that products made from Elephant poo is a little weird. LOL But, the proceeds went towards saving Elephants. If someone didn't tell you that the notebook you were holding in your hand was made from poo, you would NEVER know. I was shocked at how cute the stuff was. We walked around looking at everything for awhile, so I could delay going to the Sea Shepherd booth. Before coming to the show I didn't know if Peter would even be at the booth or if I would know any of the other Sea Shepherds that were there from the Whale Wars TV show. Then as I looked down at the booth, I saw Peter was there. I was shocked.
Now I am one of these people who doesn't get "stupid" when they see someone famous. I just was thinking to myself, "What the hell do you say?". I kept thinking about it and thinking about and nothing. I thought I would just say, "I don't know what to say to you,....your awesome!", then ask for a picture. LOL That was my plan.
When we finally reached the booth Peter was busy of course talking to other people already. I just started looking at all the stuff and talking to the Denver Sea Shepherd volunteers. They were all so nice and excited to be there, just like me. I ended up getting a cute t-shirt and a hat. I started talking to one of the girls there about Peter and she said she was also star struck when she first met Peter. She and I laughed about it and I told her I just didn't know what to say to him. It's strange to watch a person on TV for hours and hours, then there they are standing right in front of you. You "think" you know them, but they have no clue who you are. While I was in the booth talking to some of the shepherds Peter had to step outside to make a phone call. I didn't want to stalk him, so I planned to just come back later to attempt to get my picture with him.
Well an hour passed and he was still outside. I had so many brochures and purchases that we decided to take everything out to the car. I saw Peter sitting on a park bench having his picture taken with some kids. As they cleared and we walked up the sidewalk I saw my opportunity to go up to him with no one else around, except a few other Sea Shepherds. Cody was laughing at me because I was so giddy with excitement! I still didn't know what I was going to say. LOL
Peter talked to his fellow shepherds and I just stood about 4 feet from him waiting for him to acknowledge us. My first words to him were, "I don't want to be a creeper", and I laughed. He did also. I tend to say funny things to break the ice in difficult situations. We shook hands and he asked if we were fans of the show and I told him I was basically obsessed now. I spoke to him about my frustrations on not being able to get my family or friends to care about the issues I care about. We talked about where he was from. He lives in Sweden. When he told me that I blurted out, "I worked at IKEA!". He laughed and said, "We are connected. You and I". I laughed and said, "Not really".
Look at how HAPPY I am! What a dork! I hope he didn't think I was too weird.
He was super nice and easy to talk to. I am sure he gets sick of talking to fans. I would. We talked about being vegan and the show Whale Wars. I told him how the show changed my life and the person I am today. I think that's the best thing I could say really,....unlike telling a guy from Sweden that I worked at IKEA. Gosh I am a dork. It was awesome talking to him in person. I felt it was a once in a lifetime opportunity for me, even though I did tell him I am interested in doing a campaign someday. A campaign in most cases is going to Antarctica to stop Japanese whalers from killing whales. That is what the show Whale Wars focuses on. They recently started a campaign in the Portland Oregon area to keep Sea Lions from being killed. I have a feeling I will see Peter again someday. Maybe he'll remember me as the girl who worked at IKEA.
Peter's speech was amazing and so heartfelt. I know why they send him out to do shows and speeches. He is one of the most inspiring people out there. He really cares about all animals and all life. He said a dead sea is a dead world. It's so true. He made me want to get out there and do something!!!! Make a difference. Fight for something that matters. I need to get more involved. I feel it deep inside me. It almost feels like my destiny to be part of something like the Sea Shepherds. It's a good feeling.
Another thing that Peter and I talked about is how some people who dislike the Sea Shepherds call them terrorists. Peter said it deeply offends him. He says he knows people that live in New York and experienced 9-11. The term "terrorists" is used way to loosely and it angers me when someone calls them that. It's a sad world we live in. Without people like Peter and the other Sea Shepherds the oceans will die and so will the planet. Of course most of the people who are judging them as a terrorist group, eat whale meat or make money off of killing sea mammals. (Dolphins, Sharks, Sea Lions, etc.) I feel like whaling and other sea life being killed is so out of the media and most people don't know that it's even happening! I didn't. You can decide whether or not you want to help change that! I know I want to.
Thanks for reading another LONG JESSIE post!
LINKS
Visit the official Sea Shepherd website {HERE}
Read about Whale Wars {HERE} The show airs on Animal Planet on Friday nights! Watch it and see Peter! You can read more about Peter Hammarstedt {HERE}
Here is some video I took of Peter's speech. Enjoy!
This Friday Animal Planet is showing a new mini series, Whale Wars: Viking Shores. A lot of people I know roll their eyes or laugh at me when I tell them that I love the TV series Whales Wars. It is probably one of the only "reality" shows on television that actually is about an issue that is important. If only people would open their eyes to a cause like saving whales and dolphins the way they glue themselves to the TV when American Idol is on. I blog about this and talk about it, because I hope to get more people on board with me. It's very frustrating to me to not have people in my life that feel as strongly about this issue as I do. Hurtful when I am teased about even liking the show. It's not just a show, it's important. The Sea Shepherd's have been fighting whaling way before Animal Planet gave them a TV series.
Watching Whale Wars has opened my eyes to things that I didn't even know were happening in the world. I actually care about our planet now and saving our oceans. The most mind boggling thing to me is the people who do the whaling. How do they go to bed at night knowing they killed innocent animals. Not only do they kill them, the methods are inhumane. Critics call Paul Watson (the leader of the Sea Shepherd's) a terrorist and a violent person. Yet, the people saying that usually are the ones who are clubbing a dolphins head violently while the animals blood flows into the sea. A bit ironic huh? Who's the true terrorist in that situation? We need more people like Paul Watson and the Sea Shepherd's in the world, or I fear there will be no world someday. Not sure if you want to watch the show or not? This 4 minute video is a great view into this mini series that is starting this Friday night...
I hope that you may open your heart to being part of this cause. We are given the gift of nature and given the ability to live here on this planet and coexist with the wildlife. It's just another beautiful thing about life, let's protect it....
I have debated for years whether or not I want to get a tattoo. I know some people love them and others HATE them. They aren't for everybody that's for sure! I have always loved them on other people. Cody has one on his chest that he got when we started dating almost 9 years ago. I have my nose pierced. That's all I have been able to go through with. Tattoos are just a form of art to me. I never knew what I would want. Maybe a hello kitty? I want to be safe. Feel like I am getting something that I will always love. Even though when I turn 50 I may think to myself, "What was I thinking?" I have fallen in love with this beautiful whale tattoo....
It's way bigger then I would probably want to go for a first tattoo. I love it though. I keep looking at it and looking at it. If I got it I would get it on my arm. I would probably make it look a bit more girly adding more pink to it. Change the hot air balloon to regular balloons and add some hearts somewhere. I am so in love with this image. I had considered some Alice in Wonderland tattoos, but I lean more towards a whale. I feel so passionate about saving whales, that I think it would be something special to me and close to my heart. Which is what tattoos are supposed to be. Here are a few more tattoos I like...
I am still undecided. I really want to take some time to think about it. At least I finally feel like I know what I want. Baby Steps! It is forever and it's gonna hurt!
We have two bathrooms in our base house. For some reason they thought it would be smart to put ugly brown wallpaper in both the bathrooms. (I hate living in rentals!) I decided to go with a whale theme in our front bathroom. I thought maybe when we have guests over it would spark up a conversation about whales. When I designed my cute whale print I knew it would be a great way to add color to the (ugly) bathroom....
Like any bathroom, it's tiny and hard to photograph.
The tall white vase and clock are from IKEA. I found the blue vase for $3 at a thrift store recently. I was excited because the shape reminds me of a wave and the color was perfect. I have vanilla scented oil in the vase to scent the bathroom.
I would like to add some more accessories and a plant stand to the corner across from the toilet...
I kinda feel like we may end up moving before I get all the decorating done!!! Over the weekend I went to my favorite thrift store here in town and found this cute wooden whale...
I had to bring him home with me! It was meant to be! :)
This post is about how I have changed as a person this year. If you missed Part 1 you can read that first {HERE}.
Immediately following my goodbye with Cody the talk of me moving to California started. I already had a love for California and so does my friend Dan. Dan travels a lot and in the past has drove across the country many times. He was able to tell me the route I would take and it really got me pumped up about driving it. I am the type of person that once something is planted in my head, that's basically it. The decision has been made. I follow my gut and after a night of sleeping on any idea, I am good to go. Part of me has always wanted to live in California. It is just so beautiful. There is so much to see and do in California. Dan and I had a long drive back from Texas to Ohio. I had plenty of time to talk myself into the idea of just jumping in my car and going to be with my husband! So, that's what I did!
I thought, why the hell not? I wanted to be spontaneous! I wanted to just GO and live life. I wanted to be with my husband. What if this was the only chance I would ever get to live in California? It was like, "Okay, Cody + California = Right Decision!" I stayed in Ohio for 2 more months, quit my job and packed all my stuff into a storage unit. I was off!
What a trip and experience. I know not everyone will have the same "life changing" experience that I did just from driving in a car. For me it was an emotional thing. I felt so alive and free. I grew up in Ohio all my life! There isn't Mountains, rolling hills and rock sculptures. It changed me. It made me realize how much more there is to this life. How you just have to get up and GO DO STUFF. You have to experience MORE. Make the most of your life! JUST DO IT! The most breath taking part of my trip was around Flagstaff Arizona! AMAZING! Most of my drive was on Highway 40. If you ever take a road trip, I highly recommend it. The scenery is breath taking! I didn't even stop and sight see, so I can only imagine how beautiful the rest of Arizona and New Mexico are! (Can't wait to go back!)
There was a stretch of highway that was very windy through some mountains, I do believe in Arizona. I drove so much that I forget! It was so beautiful and fun to drive. I brag to Cody about it all the time. When your out there by yourself and no one else is around you just realize how precious life really is. You just feel so alive. You feel one with your surroundings.
The west has forever changed me, and I honestly don't know if I will ever be able to live anywhere else. Living in California for 3 months was such a great experience. Cody and I really enjoyed all of our time there. We miss it already. I felt so happy there, like I belonged. It just felt right. Something tells me that Cody and I haven't seen the last of California.
See my posts about Driving to California: Day 1 {HERE} Day 2 & 3 {HERE}
There is a whole other point to this entirely way to long blog post.
It is something that I have gone back in forth with myself about, wondering if I should share it with my readers or not. If you have followed my blog for awhile, you may know that I used to post about watching movies a lot. I would rate them and let you know if I hated it or loved it. Well over time I pretty much watched everything on Netflix that I wanted to. When Cody was gone, besides watching Roseanne I watched movies. Lots of movies! Then I started to watch television shows instead. This started when I moved to California. Are you wondering where this is going, why it matters if I share this? Bear with me here. I hadn't had television cable in years. Needless to say I didn't know half the shows that had been on TV for years! I started watching a series called DOG TOWN. Dog Town is a show about the Best Friends Animal Society in the state of Utah. The show is amazing! It really shows you the behind the scenes of how many animals are neglected and abused in the world. Something I really knew nothing about. The Best Friends Animal Society takes in all types of animals and nurse them back to life so they can be put up for adoption. I would cry and cry watching some of the episodes and seeing the abuse. Most of the stories did have happy endings, which was also emotional to watch at times. Of course now that I was living with a roommate who had cable in her house, I would watch TV during the afternoon.
At first I watched HGTV daily! I really had missed HGTV. Cody would come over on the weekends and we would try to agree on a channel. (Never HGTV.) We would watch Animal Planet sometimes, but mostly we watched shows like COPS. One night after I took Cody back to the base, I decided to not go to bed and just watch some TV by myself. I turned it to Animal Planet and a show called Whale Wars was on. I didn't know what it was and at first I had no idea what was going on. Each episode is an hour long, so of course I got sucked in. It was full of so much excitement and something was always happening that kept me on the edge of my seat. I started watching it in the middle of a season. Most of what was happening didn't make sense. I also didn't realize that what they were doing was so important. I am sure most people know about the show Whale Wars. I think its getting ready to go into its 6Th Season. Whale Wars is about a group of people called Sea Shepherd's that are trying to stop whaling and the killing of other wildlife. Well I was lucky and Netflix had Season 1 - 3 for me to watch. I got sucked in. Then I got Cody sucked in.
The reason I am hesitant to post about this is because I know not everyone may support what the Whale Wars show stands for. I am not someone to talk about any type of politics or religious things on my blog! It's a design blog!! I also don't because in my real life I have had life long friends stop talking to me because we didn't have the same beliefs and views. Agreeing to disagree wasn't okay with them. They decided it was better to just stop talking to me and end our life long friendship. I have seen what debating about issues does to people. The stress it can cause and the hatred. We all have opinions, that is part of being human. I don't debate with anyone. I rather be friends. I feel like no matter who you are or what your beliefs, stopping the killing of our Wildlife may connect us all. Going to California this year gave me the chance to see the Ocean up close and personal. It's so beautiful, along with all the wildlife that lives in it.
Of course, Muffins loved the beach!
The reason I am saying all this to you is because right now my heart is broken. I have been watching Whale Wars since May of this year. I started recycling this year because of Whale Wars. The things that I have seen on that show, other documentaries about the Ocean and the Sea Shepherd's have made me view the world differently. It hasn't changed my political views, it's just made me more knowledgeable of things that are happening in the world that no one knows about! You can love animals no matter how you vote. Animals will love you back and our wildlife is so important. It's a planet thing, it's about caring and doing your part to spread the word about things people don't even know about. Endangered animals being slaughtered for money is what I see. By watching these shows and movies I have learned the importance of these animals in the Ocean. How we need them to make the world go round. The world we all live in together. I had never even heard of whaling! A lot of people won't even give the show Whale Wars a chance, or they make fun of it. I don't think this is a fair thing to say if you don't know why they are actually out there or what they are doing. They are out in the ocean fighting the Whalers because no one else will. They are some of the bravest people I have ever seen in my entire life. It takes a lot of courage to risk your life to save Whales, or for any cause you feel strongly about. It takes compassion and bravery!
Two great films that made me love Whales even more! Lots of great information.
Every night I go to bed I have to fall asleep watching TV. A few nights ago Cody was super sleepy and was out like a rock in like 5 minutes. I decided to watch one of the last Whale documentaries that I hadn't watched yet on Netflix. The movie is called The Cove. I had never heard of it. It came out in 2009. I have to say nothing I have ever watched in my life made me cry this much. I had to pause it and go get Kleenex. Why was it so sad? It's raw footage of Dolphins being murdered. I don't know a lot about Dolphins, but do know more after watching this movie, The Cove. Dolphins are so harmless to people. Most people love them. You see a Dolphin and you smile. They are extremely smart and have been know to save drowning humans. Why am I telling you this? Because I feel helpless and frustrated that even after this movie was filmed that these poor Dolphins are still being killed every year in Japan. It's hard for me to swallow because the evidence of wrong doing is so clear in the footage, yet nothing is done to stop it. Whaling is so tragic and heartbreaking to me. I just want people like me, who didn't know this was all happening in the world we live in, to also know about it. I think it's important to spread the word. Like I said, its all about the animals and our planet. Nothing else. To see an innocent sea creature being killed pulls at my heart strings like nothing else in this world can. I didn't even realize it till I watched these shows and movies. All I want is to let people know about it and if they choose to learn more, they can. I feel like maybe if I say something, someone else will also care as much as I do. Then they will also spread the word.
I have always loved animals but I guess I didn't realize how much till this year. I have always been into decorating and design. In high school I was an Art student. Art and design is all I ever really wanted to do. Earlier this year I had planned on going to college for Web Design. Well, design stuff has been put on the back burner. With the exception of my blog and decorating around my house. I am happy to announce that I finally got a job here in Wyoming. I am going to be working as an Animal Care Specialist. Not only did Cody joining the Air Force turn my life upside down, it has changed me. I am a true believe of the saying,"Everything happens for a reason." It did for me this year. I am still me. Just happier inside. I feel like I finally am going to have a job that matters. I feel like I am going to make a difference. If I had the guts to do what the Sea Shepherd's do, I would. I don't know how to swim and even though I think the ocean is beautiful, it is also one of my biggest fears to be out in the open water. Ironic? All I ask is that if you are an animal lover, take the time to research or read about some of the things I talked about. I feel like this is a way I can make a difference, by sharing it with others.
Thanks. This is all from the bottom of my heart. Love, Jessie
